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Hoots & Havers - January 2008

Apparently the main reason why we have red squirrels up here rather than grey is thanks to pine martens. The reds have grown up with the martens over millennia and the greys have not. Consequently the reds have learned to skip about amid the frothy branch tops out of reach of such predators while the greys plod about on the lower branches or forage on the ground where they are easily snapped up for lunch.

I’ve only ever seen one grey in the Birks and that was some years ago, but the reds there are common. Often they are tooling about near the car park and give much pleasure to the small and fluffy dog which enjoys chasing them as well as cats and rabbits while making quite sure never to get dangerously close to any of them. On one embarrassing occasion it saw a rabbit and ran at it. The pursued was suffering from myxomatosis, or something similar and, instead of fleeing in the opposite direction, came straight at the dog. Pursued became the pursuer and the intrepid hunter came scuttling back and peered at the rabbit from behind the safety of my legs as it lollopped dopily up to receive a bonk on its head from my stick.

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Good heavens! It snowed the other day. The soggy skim didn’t last, of course, but its weight stripped branches from trees and managed to block the paths through the Birks. It was the lead story on the TV news. Cars skittered off roads. Gallant gritters gritted. Kiddies were shown throwing snowballs. Much chaos ensued. And then it went away again.

I have friends in the north of the USA who, at this time of year, tend to send me snow snaps of their garden. They usually show the man of the house with a happy grin holding a shovel standing next to a snowdrift which towers above him. But their world doesn’t fall apart. Is it just about having more gritters than we do? And isn’t it time that the Health and Safety folk did something about snow. Ban it, for instance.

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John Stewart of Kynachan (pictured) fought in the ’15 Rising and ended up in the Tower of London. His estate was confiscated, but the Duke of Atholl was happy to return it a few years later in exchange for a substantial sum of money. This letter was sent to his son when John died in 1733.

‘To David Stewart, esquire at Kynachan, Perth. (Mon) May 25th. 1733

Sir, The melancholy accounts of the death of so worthy so good and honest a friend could not but affect me in a very sensible manner, but this being a debt we have all to pay we ought to submit cheerfully and make a right use of this hidden summons namely to be in a readiness to pay this debt ourselves when it shall please God to call on us.

I heartily sympathize with your mother on this doleful occasion, and pray that God who is a husband to the Widow may support her under this very heavy affliction, and make her children dutiful and comfortable friends to her.

I have sent my apprentice David Carr with a cerecloth which I believe will be needful since the weather is warm and the burial not sooner than Thursday, he will give directions anent rimming the coffin, and leave perfuming oils to rub over the coffin the day of the interment a little before lifting the corpse. The sooner he is put in the coffin the better.

My wife has given orders to the baker who will have everything ready tomorrow forenoon, and she has sent several things by this bearer in case that any of them do not fit or please you they may be returned tomorrow with David Carr, so as they may be changed and others sent in their place. There is sent a pair of stockings, hat and crape, gloves, buckles and buttons.

Your linings shall be ready according to direction against Tuesday morning early against which time the tailor has engaged to have your clothes ready and Toschach has promised to have your shoes very soon.

There will be a suit of fashionable linings for your mother and sisters, ready in a day, but I’ll take no more off but one suit for each of them till my wife get their particular directions, and as for their gowns it is not practicable to make them till either their measures or a gown for every one that suits or fits them best be sent for the tailor’s direction, and let him know if they have black petticoats already or if there’s occasion to take to Killiecrankie for new ones for your sisters, but your mother’s must be either cloth or flannel as she pleases, but they must send the length of their petticoats and aprons.

I have sent two patches of flannel to your mother for choice for her gown, and send either the measures or a gown of your mother’s and one of every one of your sisters.

I spoke to Mr Wood about the clothes and we both agree that if the burial is not sooner than Thursday it will be soon enough to fit the clothes Tuesday morning and your horses may be here to go off Tuesday night and travel all night, and they’ll be home in time enough, but if you want to have the clothes sooner send word with David Carr. If possibly I can get away I’ll endeavor to be with you Wednesday night but cannot positively promise. My wife and all here join in making offer of our humble service to your mother and family and I am   

Your affect.friend and humble servant,

JN: SMYTH

After writing, my wife thinks needless to send patches of flannel, for the finest is what my wife thinks the only one that’s proper, there is three pairs of mourning gloves but if any of them do not fit, return them.