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Postcard From the Algarve - April 08

Having gone on about the delights of this wonderful country month after month, it’s only just that I draw attention to its principal drawback - the average Portuguese driver.

I must have told you before that very few shops stock replacement bulbs for indicators as nine out of ten drivers do not use their indicators. They might slow down before turning, they might, but they’ll never let you know. Of course, this is a minor irritation compared with their coming out of side roads without stopping, or treating the white line in the centre of the road as a guide to run between their front wheels.

When I first came to the Algarve I was told to beware of women drivers overtaking on bends while talking on their mobiles. Clearly an exaggeration, I thought, until it happened to me. I was travelling downhill towards a right hand bend when a young lady in a very smart car overtook me about 100 metres from the bend talking on her phone which was tucked in between her ear and shoulder, steering with her left hand and using her right hand to touch up her lipstick, which, of course, meant that she was checking herself in the driving mirror. I pulled in:I had no wish to come across the gruesome accident she was bound to cause

But I may have found the reason for these poor driving standards. Many Portuguese drivers have not passed their driving test. They may well have taken it, but not passed it, and have still been given a driving licence.  We know a middle aged lady, who had lived most of her life in the country. She moved to Faro, (the Algarve’s Stirling) registered at a driving school (essential to obtain a driving licence) and eventually went for her test.

‘Do you want to pay, or take the test?’ asked the instructor quite openly.  When the lady looked puzzled, the instructor explained. ‘If you pay me, I will sign the form saying you have passed your test’. She took the test and passed, in spite of the instructor telling her to ignore stop signs and turn into no entry streets!

So, it may be that many Portugeuse drivers just pay.